Why was the blonde staring at the bottle of orange juice? She was reading the nutrition facts, as she was trying to watch her weight.

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Q: Why did the Mexican mother leave her baby in the hot car during summer? A: Because she was irresponsible and forgetful.

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What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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how many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? none, they hire mexicans to do it

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

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Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

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Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

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Turkeys are obese

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A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why did the Mexican go to Taco Bell? Because he thought it was a real restaurant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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