what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've tested positive for herpes We probably shouldn't have intercourse

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red

Justin Bieber walks into a bar…. He was shot

What does the ice cream man say to the kids? Hey kids want some ice cream?

What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

What was 6 affraid of 7? because 7 was black.

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

What do Robbers Get for Christmas? Other peoples things.

I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

What are jews without the holocaust? Alive

a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? So it would not get hit

An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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