Walking down a cold, lonely, deserted street is a 10 year old who lost her parents. she has with her in plain sight her fathers wallet, so full of cash that it is literally too full. all of a sudden, a black man with a gum jumps out from around the corner. he then proceeds to mug her and shoot her. thanking the man for playing cops with her using finger guns, she goes home with a new coffee mug and a stick of gum. she died three days later from unrelated incidents.

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Nothing, they're extinct.

Justin Beiber

what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

What do you call a fat priest? Obese

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

If the black man lives in the black house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The white man. As unfortunate as it is, racism is still a very integral part of society, and the social dominance the white man holds in countries like America are not to be so quickly forgotten.

Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

Want to hear a joke? 12 year olds

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

Q: Why did Hitler Kill himself? A: Because his wife couldn't match the pleasure of his massive Nazi Orgies

Why did hellen keller's dog kill itself? You would to if your name was, AIIEEEEIUUUUHGH!

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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