A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Roses are Rose, Violets are Violet.

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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Five guys in white sheets chase a black man down the street. It is Halloween and all six people are close friends and enjoy goofing around.

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Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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