Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

a black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. the bartender says thats cool where did you get it ....... the parrot says africa

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

I hate it when I press submit, and I forgot to finish the jo

Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

What starts with an N, ends with R, and you arent supposed to say? Never

I once saw my grandparents making love.. that's why I dont eat raisens

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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