Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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whats the worst kind of homework? child abuse

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hi penis ham telephone

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

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A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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A man used a ruler to measure his foot, it was size 11

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? Fuck you.

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What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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knock knock who's there? doorbell repairman

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

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Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

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Why did Superman cross the road? I dunno.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops