Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc, I've been having the strangest dreams First I'm a tee pee, Then I'm a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam! What could be wrong with me?" The doctor looks at the man and says, "You have aids."

What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

What fires shots? A gun

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

NEVER

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

A Hispanic was walking down the street, he turned left and was at his house.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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