i have alzheimer's, so i forgot the punchline to this joke

thumb_up thumb_down

how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

thumb_up thumb_down

Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is yellow, and cannot swim? A School Bus.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Know Who's there? Not your dog, he just got run over.

thumb_up thumb_down

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

thumb_up thumb_down

you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why can't kids do drugs in school? Because it's against the rules.

thumb_up thumb_down

there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down

what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down

I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down

A chicken crossed the road. It was run over before reaching the other side. by fast asleep

thumb_up thumb_down

I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops