Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

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A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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How do you make your house smell bad? fart

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Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

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Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

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Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

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You should read the Terms of Service.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

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rent a cops

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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When life throws you melons, You probably won't catch them.

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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Whats The difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull? One's a dog ones a human. 363\

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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