What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

why did your mum die young because she had canser

A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

Yes, it's for the patiënt in the other room.

What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

I C U P White stuff

Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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