What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats Better Than Apple Pie Sweeeet Pie

thumb_up thumb_down -1

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops