what do you call a toddler with a gun? uninteresting

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

whats worse than forgetting your lunch at home? getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven stabbed his mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I have the answer to why the child stepped on a ball-he was dumb

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What has two legs? Half a cat

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops