what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

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there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

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Ted: Joe, do you think I'm dumb? Joe: No, I think you're Ted.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Female rights.

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

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A man decided to enter the local pun contest. He sent in ten puns. One of them was very witty and he won the contest and felt very good about himself.

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What did the athiest get for christmas? Well he shouldn't get anything becuase he doesn't belive in jesus.

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what do you call a cat with no tail? smithers.

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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roses are red violets are blue What smells like poo? Your waffle's blue

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How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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Stop procrastinating.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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what's 9+10? 19, not 21

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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What's a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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