Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

Is everything funnier when u have a vagina.

"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

roses are blue violets are red heres a gun now your dead

Billy: Hey hey hey!!!!! wanna hear a dirty joke? Joe: Sure Billy: A pig fell in the mud

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

A car enters a curve. An ice-cream man pops out from a manhole and throws a pine cone to the car.

im saul and i love cock

Sharvil has aids 4 times

There are two cows standing in a field eating grass. The first cow says "moo", the second cow says "Thats funny, I was about to say that".

What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

What do I hate? people

What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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