How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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What kind of shots does John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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The cream, it is coming

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

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What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops