What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

An African American walks into a bar. The bar tender is a racist, so he asks the African American gentleman to leave.

What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

What's big, yellow and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A JCB!

Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

What s the difference between a pigeon ?

Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

Where did Susie go when her town was bombed? Everywhere.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...