If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

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what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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Your d is so small that when you had a boner and walked into the wall....... YOU BROKE YOUR NOSE! Millimeter Monster bro

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, speaking to a bird would have been considered highly irregular, bordering on insane. He left the bird alone, until the time came to slaughter the bird and take it's nutritious meat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

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why did the dad stop working on the roof he fell off

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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What happens when you drive down the road? you get to the end of the road

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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How many dead bodies does it take to fill up a bathtub? Wellll.......... It depends on how big the bathtub is.

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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