How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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So a horse walks into a barn.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

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A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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Why did the chicken rape your...wait, that's not how it goes!

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

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How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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