So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

Guy: Hey, you want to dance with me? Girl: Who me? Guy: Nooo that bench over there...

Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

There are two muffins in the oven. The first says to the other, "Its getting hot in here." The second, befuddled, replies, "AHH! A talking muffin!"

Knock Knock Who's there May I come in? May I come in who? . . .What's wrong with you can I come in or not?

What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

When do you know when to stop making anti- jokes? when your done with your joke and click submit.

The Blonde walked into a wall.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was sexually abusive.

What does the president and the prime minister of china have in common, Sickle cell anemia. 342

Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

What do you call a teenager who cant add? A Total Failure

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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