What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why did the chicken cross the road? because it was tired of the people on the side she was on who told lame anti jokes, so she tried to stay away from them.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

thumb_up thumb_down -33

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why? Because.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Racial Equality

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How many orangoutangs does it take to screw in a light bulb? 16; mongoloid

thumb_up thumb_down -35

The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't sexual abuse, which her sister had experienced while traveling around the world in 2007.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops