Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

This is not a joke.

how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

So a baby seal walks into a club...

Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

penis

A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...