There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Asshole huh? Dont give me any ideas. Again you are not high on weed are you? Then that's really bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the Iraqi airline crash? The pilot was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

thumb_up thumb_down +3

when trouble come down in your neighborhood who you gonna call? the local law enforcement or another form of personal protection

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If you can't read this, you should think about optical enhancement surgery. If you can, however, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life doing so.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? I don't know, dinosaurs have been extinct for 200 million years.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's large, black and can be found in Australia? A large black Australian man.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops