what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

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How types of people are there? One, we are the only homo sapiens.

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I got drunk last night and woke up in a bed and that's when I saw it. A 400 pound woman was in front of me and I could see the sweat drip down her ass fat and she let out a putrid fart right in my face. It smelt like rotten eggs and cheesy cauliflower. I am horrified.

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what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

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Did you hear the one about the black guy that went to college? Me niether

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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why did the old man lose his hair Because he had cancer and needed kimmo therapy

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

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who do we all like george goodburn

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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