cancer

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What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? Because she had no arms. Knock, Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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What's dirtier than an ice cream cone rolled in dirt? The dirt it was rolled in.

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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how man

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops