How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

a read head, a brunet, and a blonde sneak into a merchant ship. security hears some noises and goes on to investigate. all three girls jump into banana sacks. security guard kicks the first sack with the read head in it and she growls like a dog, so the security sees its a dog and keeps on walking. he then kicks the sack with the brunet in it, she goes on to hiss like a cat. so then the security guard kicks the last sack with the blonde in it, and she yells out "bananas!"...the end

What do owls and cars have in common? Nothing.

I want to make a lamp shade out of your skin, because you light up my life.

Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

Why was rebecca crying? Because her mum had just died in a house fire!!!

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

why did Susie cry? she got pecked in the face by a goose

An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

BIG PENIS

A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

What does God say when a balck person is person is borned? "Another burnt one"

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

One muffin says to the other muffin "it sure is hot in here." the other muffin replies "you know, technically, we're not muffins because we're not done cooking yet."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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