How many pianos does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to change the lightbulb, and one to play a motivational tune.

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why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

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Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why? Because.

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boy and girl are flipping a coin, coin lands on heads, boy: get down bitch

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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What did Luigi say to Mario? You look like a fat Mexican

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

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Why did Susie fell off the swings? Because she didn't have any arms or legs.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops