What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school today? Because it is Saturday

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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Women's rights.

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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