Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

A man wakes up in the hospital after being in a car accident. He begins to yell "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor hurries into the room to find out why the patient is yelling. The doctor then promptly explains that this was due to the crash severing his spinal cord and rendering him paraplegic for the rest of his life. The doctor after explaining this states he'll never walk again, before leaving the patient's room.

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

What do you call a squirrel in my yard? Dead.

There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

I don't believe in giraffes.

What does a white man say when you slug him in the face with a club. Ow.

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

SEX IS LIKE MATH ADD THE BED SUBTRACT THECLOTHES DIVIDE THE LEGS AND PRAY U DONT MULTIPLY!!!!

(Timmy has no arms or legs.) A:Knockknock! B:Who's there? ANot Timmy

What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...