Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

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An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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