What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. The Englishman ordered a lager, the Irishman ordered a Guiness, and the Scotsman ordered tap water.

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Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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Fine, ladies first.

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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What happens when you hit a black guy with your car? He is seriously injured.

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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