Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god."

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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what do u call a kid with autism? a autistic s.o.b or Hennon bart

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What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

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What did the Turkey say on Thanksgiving? Gobble gobble.

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HEY.... HEY YOU..... YEA YOU! IM TALKING TO YOU!!! yolo

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What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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Rivals? Someone from the past? Erron, who is "WE"! Tell me now!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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