There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

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Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

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Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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Nothing. He made it home safely.

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Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

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Women's rights

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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The Labour Party.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

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Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocaust Whats worse that two Holocaust? Dane Cooks Comedian act

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Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops