what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

What do you get when you hit a kid with a hockeystick? arrested.

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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