How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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horses are burgers now ive got the flu watch out tescos because im gonna sue

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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My spelling is horrible

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Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

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have you seen stevie wonder's house. no? Well nethier has he you

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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ure mama's so fat

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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Bitch

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Have you ever heard of a goose?

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Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

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how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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