I walked across a lake once. Someone said "JESUS CHRIST!" to which I replied with "YES?"

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Who's on first? Garvey.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

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a man was shot.... he died

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What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

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What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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