Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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BIG MAC'S

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

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What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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roses are red, violets are blue. you've got Alzheimer's, it sucks to be you

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Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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What's 2+2? Fish

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Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ...because chickens love to confound people.

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you see theres this guy.

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Your're racist.

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Lololol

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How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops