Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What cant you give a black guy? A: Black eye, lips, and a jon

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

thumb_up thumb_down -12

9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

thumb_up thumb_down -12

roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops