knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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