Double-whammy

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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800 people died last year. end of story

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So a horse walks into a bar. The rancher immediately contacted medical help, and with a little teamwork, the horse was treated and revived.

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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