you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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who do we all like george goodburn

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What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

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how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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penis in the camel

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what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

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Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

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A high school student finally gets the nerve to ask his long-time crush on a date. They begin dating, and eventually settle down and get married. After six months of marriage, she dies in a car crash and he spends years in therapy.

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Whats funny? Your face.

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What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

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whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Scumbag steve walks into his friend's dorm room, and finds out he has epilepsy. He then flicks the lights on and off really fast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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