How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

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Q: Why are elephants afraid of mice and/or rats? A: Elephants tend to have bad eyesight and startle quite easily?

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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What is covered in red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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What Did Sally Get For Christmas? A Bicycle

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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If you come to Anti-Joke.com to look at the Newest jokes please leave a comment. Thank you!

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Whats funny about a fat person dying? He died while eating friend chicken

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If my balls were on your chin, where would my dick be?

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Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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what is worse than joel an infested asshole

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Which deranged adventurer thinks that (one`s unprotected cranium) is stronger than (a brick structure) Mario. he keeps bashing his head on blocks in attempts to prove his own worth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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