What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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your so fat. your fat!

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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Want to hear a joke You're Adopted

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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A dyslexic walks into a bar. He called it a bra because he was dyslexic and dyslexics misspell things. People laughed at him because mental disabilities are inherently humorous to them.

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops