Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

Women's rights

Nothing. He made it home safely.

A praying mantis is very graceful

why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

How do you make a plumber cry? I'm sorry but our princess is in another castle.

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and about not being funny.

Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

Whats the difference between a green apple and a red apple? Their colors.

In Soviet Russia, it is usually cold throughout the year, as it is located in a colder region of the planet.

why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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