Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

Knock Knock? Come in.

one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

Roses are red, Violets are red, you are a liar, oh wait you're not!! MY BACKYARD'S ON FIRE

What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

An alien just ate your family and all of the things you love

Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why did the purse kill a circus yeast? Secks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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