A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Why can't the black person drown? He is very well trained at swimming.

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

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whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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so a man walks into a bar *pint of bud there please

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She doesn't have arms. Knock, knock, Who's there? Not Sarah.

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

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What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops