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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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hers a joke... japanese people

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

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What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Hey, you must be a parking ticket. Because you are on the windshield of my car.

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what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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If you don`t see a banner here, it doesn`t mean it wont come back to annoy you whenever it feels like.... P.S, Advertising helps us get rich while permanently harming your ability to focus, Please be understanding! PS: Why the hell do they use capital letters after you know, Commas? its, Weird!

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Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

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Q: are you gay? A: maybe

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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Good job, son.

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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What would you get when you cross a bear and a shark? a highly improbable situation because sharks and bears live completely different environments.

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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What is big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree A pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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