I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many baby can u fit in a cup? A: it depends how strong ur blender is How do you get them out? A: tortilla chips

thumb_up thumb_down -16

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Now this bible thing, is a real anti joke so get ready to have your faith tested, and overcome it: There was that story where God charged against an army at the top of some mountains, the army is told to have been led with God personally at the front rank right? But they lost because the enemy had horse wagons (you know what I mean) made of steel or iron, (does not matter what it is if you ask yourself really) I mean even if it was Metatron, he would have had uh... Wings or something to even the odds, Maybe God is like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, he needs to become a Mortal in order to enter fights on earth... MORTAL KOMBAAAT! I mean God made humans humans made Sin (gotta say we get the blame for a lot of shit others did, I hate apples and cant even stand the smell of them for once, never ate one)

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust Whats worse that the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok lets... wait.. wtf I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I'm an old man with Alzheimer's. Ok I'm going to tell you a little story. Well i was walking down the road bout 36 sum odd years ago and the next thing i knew i was........... Hmmm.... i wonder whats in the fridge...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops