What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb One because lawyers are usually well educated and know how to screw in a lightbulb

Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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