Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

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black people

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wanna hear a joke? yes

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

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Ill never forget the last phone conversation i had with my Jewish friend before he died due to the 9/11 incident. Friend:owejpq3jhp3qjopiqwejhriopjhaiophfioashiohwih13ioh3f2893hoiqehefioahfioahisdpahdfajdfopasjiopdfajdfopsajradalkdjakldja;hdfkl;adhlpa;dhfakl;dhkladhkadhlkhdjklahdjkgsdjkgbdqwgy3bi3grqbhgjkasjkdkasjdgjkadgskajgdkajdsgjkasgdad

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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I can't submit this joke because I got the captcha wrong

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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If life throws you fried chicken your probably black

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

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Penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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