What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

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Why did the bunny give you a funny look? It has epilepsy.

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Why couldn't my grandpa use a cell phone? He didn't have hands.

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What do you call a fat, ugly kid? An unloved child.

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why did joe drown ? he had no arms

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What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

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What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

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A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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What's worse than having to tie one of your shoelaces after walking 5 miles? Getting a 56 year old mixture of blood, urine and sperm injected in your asshole.

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What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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