Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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What did the police officer say to the boy in the park? your parents were killed in a car accident.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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My nipple is bleeding

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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Let's write an anti-joke. K.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Dislike if you're a virgin ;)

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

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What's the difference between a baby and an egg? One is fun to throw at houses and the other is an egg.

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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There was a mexican and a african in a car, who was driving? The cop, because both of these men are rapists.

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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