-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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why'd my house get destroyed I was afraid the tornado that hit mass was going to destroy it so I blew it up

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-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

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OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

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What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

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Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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who has less of a soul then you? a ginger

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? one baby nailed to ten trees.

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nice tits.

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why doesnt jesus play hockey? he got nailed to the boards

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Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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