why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

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Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

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yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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